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Movie Reviews

Piranha

Rated: R

Alexandre Aja's "Piranha" is an update of Joe Dante's 1978 film of the same name. Now I've never seen the original film, but I imagine it would be almost exactly like this remake with the same vacationers, piranhas, water, and lots of screaming. True, the stories may be a little bit different, but do you really think anyone going to see this movie is going to be overly concerned about the story?

The Switch

Rated: PG-13

Throughout "The Switch," I had one question in the back of my mind: "Why did this movie get made?" It's true that this is a question I ask every time a romantic-comedy comes along that follows the exact same formula as the previous one, but it's really as though they are just not trying all that hard anymore.

Takers

Rated: PG-13

John Luessenhop's "Takers" is a heist film like any other, and therein lies its first major problem. This is a movie that most people have already seen, one that has been done in a much better fashion with films like "The Italian Job" and "The Bank Job." With "Takers," it appears that the writers thought the essentials of a heist film were a half-baked heist sequence and lots and lots of gunfire. They seem to forget that if there's not a good story and characters in place to carry those extra elements, none of them will matter.

Nanny McPhee Returns

Rated: PG

Emma Thompson is back to reprise her role as the nanny with strict means to teach children, but who's heart is in the right place. It's been five years since the release of the original film that had been a surprisingly charming story of rambunctious kids in a desperate family emergency, and now, with "Nanny McPhee Returns," we have....pretty much the same thing.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

Rated: PG-13

Edgar Wright's long-awaited adaptation of Bryan Lee O'Malley's "Scott Pilgrim" graphic novel series is finally here. Being a big fan of the graphic novels and hearing Wright's name attached to the film gave me some very high hopes for this project, and, like usual, he doesn't disappoint. He somehow manages to take the insanity of the series and cram it into a 112-minute film while preserving its essence and important sections, which is pretty impressive seeing as how it's a six-volume series.

Dinner for Schmucks

Rated: PG-13

Here's a film I've been dreading ever since the first trailers and TV spots started rolling. They made this film look like it was going to be something of an agonizing experiencing what with having to watch Steve Carell act like an idiot for an entire movie, and since he's usually not particularly funny anyway, it could have been just that. This made it all the more surprising that the film was actually amusing and provided a lot of good, solid laughs.

Salt

Rated: PG-13

This is one of those movies that it seems like we've been hearing about for a long time now. "Salt" was originally scripted for a male lead with Tom Cruise taking the role. However, Cruise felt it was too close to his "Mission: Impossible" films (he's already done the rogue on the run) and decided to back out, leaving the role open for someone else. In steps Angelina Jolie, causing the script to be revised for a female lead.

Inception

Rated: PG-13

Cobb (Leonardo DiCaprio) is an expert at extraction, the art of invading someone's dream and stealing their hidden secrets. The film begins with him doing just that to a businessman, Saito (Ken Watanabe), who has secrets that another company wants. However, after this mission, Saito wants to hire Cobb, not for extraction, but for the infinitely more difficult mission of inception, the planting of an idea in someone's head in such a way that it seems to have been created naturally.

The Other Guys

Rated: PG-13

Looking through Will Ferrell's filmography is like navigating a minefield of bad decisions. This includes such films as "Land of the Lost," "Step Brothers," "Semi-Pro," "Blades of Glory," and "Talladega Nights" (though to be fair, he did make a couple of decent films with "Stranger than Fiction" and...

The Sorcerer's Apprentice

Rated: PG

"The Sorcerer's Apprentice" reunites director Jon Turteltaub with actor Nicolas Cage, who had both previously worked on the underrated "National Treasure" films. While those films had been fun and full of adventure, it felt like those were the elements that were missing from their latest effort. This film isn't completely lacking in those areas, but sadly, they seem to have taken a backseat to the special effects.

Despicable Me

Rated: PG

In a summer that's been dominated by Pixar's "Toy Story 3" comes a smaller animated film entitled "Despicable Me" that was barely even on my radar before I attended the screening. I expected another short, simple kids' film with a few jokes and maybe a few loud noises to keep the children interested, but to my surprise, it ended up being much more than that.

The Last Airbender

Rated: PG

M. Night Shyamalan has been having quite a troubled career. He started off so well with the innovative and creepy "The Sixth Sense" and would go on to make a couple of decent films with "Signs" and "The Village," but took a sharp dive with his recent projects, "Lady in the Water" and "The Happening," both of which turned out to be disastrously bad. Sadly, we must now add his latest film, "The Last Airbender," to that list.

Predators

Rated: R

Back in 1987, a small film called "Predator" rolled into theaters. It wasn't the kind of film that you would expect to become a staple of the sci-fi/action genre, but it surprisingly became famous and even spawned a few sequels. It's fair to say that the sequels, which include some team-ups with the creatures from the "Alien" franchise, were not well-received, so it was opted to take the franchise back to its roots...

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

Rated: PG-13

"Eclipse" once again finds Bella (Kristen Stewart) and vampire Edward (Robert Pattinson) still madly in love with each other. She still wants Edward to turn her into a vampire while he's still trying to talk her out of it and into marriage. Also still in her life is her other friend, Jacob (Taylor Lautner), a werewolf who also loves Bella.

Knight and Day

Rated: PG-13

James Mangold's "Knight and Day" is an action-packed, edge of your seat thrill ride that barely pauses long enough for you to take a breath. It's the kind of movie that has plot, but not too much plot to get in the way of having a good time, all wrapped up in a story that ends up taking you around the world as it keeps its main characters in continuous danger.

Jonah Hex

Rated: PG-13

"Jonah Hex" is a film that was riddled with bad publicity from the start. Early test screenings of the film were calling it a disaster, and even after some reshoots earlier this year, the bad word of mouth continued. It was then said that the film would not be screened for critics, which is usually the case with a film that will likely get a slew of negative reactions, but then, all of a sudden, at the last second, early critical reviews started rolling in, mostly confirming the rumors of a very troubled film. It was a strange choice for the studio to suddenly change their minds, especially since most of the rumors are true.

Grown Ups

Rated: PG-13

There are two things you need to know about "Grown Ups" before you even think about possibly seeing it. First, it stars "Saturday Night Live" alum Adam Sandler, who hasn't been the least bit funny since he left that show so many years ago. Second, this film is directed by Dennis Dugan, whose other failures include "I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry," "You Don't Mess With the Zohan,” and "Big Daddy," all starring Sandler (This list goes on, but I'll try to spare him further humiliation). Long story short, when Sandler and Dugan get together for a project, it spells disaster.

Toy Story 3

Rated: G

More than ten years after the last sequel to the original animated hit, Pixar finally brings us the latest chapter in the "Toy Story" series. The first two films are marveled at for their amazing animation, excellent storytelling, and their fascinating technique of delving into the emotional bonds between humans and their toys. "Toy Story 3" hopes to continue that tradition by bringing back all of the old favorites, and even a few new ones.

Splice

Rated: R

"Splice" is one of those experiment-gone-wrong stories in the tradition of "Frankenstein" or "The Fly." They tend to involve interesting ideas about what can happen when one pushes the boundaries of science to the extreme in order to discover something new and potentially useful to mankind. However, when compared to those other two stories, "Splice" comes up rather short in its exploration of the idea.

The A-Team

Rated: PG-13

"The A-Team," an adaptation of the famous television show from the '80s, is best compared to another recent film, "The Losers." Both films are silly, over-the-top, and include action sequences that come off as hilarious, and even though the plots may be incomprehensible at times, they still deliver one hell of a ride.

The Karate Kid

Rated: PG

The vast originality of Hollywood strikes again with an update of "The Karate Kid," a small film that became very popular and even spawned several sequels. Why on Earth somebody thought that we needed a remake of the original film is anybody's guess, but here it is with a few small changes to the story in an effort to make it seem fresh.

Get Him to the Greek

Rated: R

Nicholas Stoller's "Get Him to the Greek" is not exactly built off of an original character. How many times before have we seen alcohol, drugs, and promiscuous behavior get in the way of a celebrity's career?

Killers

Rated: PG-13

Robert Luketic's "Killers" takes a worn out premise and somehow manages to make it feel even more tired than before. What we basically have here is a film that is trying to be like "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" with only one of the couple being a killer.....and minus the thrills, humor, chemistry, and interesting dialogue that had made "Smith" memorable.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Rated: PG-13

"Prince of Persia" is the latest video game to get adapted into a motion picture. I learn from the always-resourceful Wikipedia that the video game series started back in 1989 and has had more than a dozen games. I have never played a single entry in the series, but that shouldn't stop me from enjoying the film, right? A good video game adaptation should be able to stand on its own without knowledge of the workings of the game or its story.

Shrek Forever After

Rated: PG

It's hard to believe it's already been nine years since the original "Shrek" came to theaters. It was an amazing sight to behold; a film that was a great mixture of fairy tale, humor, and drama. This was followed by two decent sequels that had some funny moments to them. Now Shrek returns in what is supposedly the final chapter in the saga.

MacGruber

Rated: R

Jorma Taccone's "MacGruber" is a great example of just how far "Saturday Night Live" has fallen in the last several years. A show that once held great comedic talents has withered away into an unfunny batch of lame skits.

Just Wright

Rated: PG

I remember watching this film a couple of weeks back when it was called "The Back-Up Plan" and before that it was known by many other titles. Sure the plots aren't necessarily the same, but they hit the exact same beats every single time. So this time, we have the same old, dried-up formula coming back for another round, this time with some sport sprinkled in.

Robin Hood

Rated: PG-13

It's hard to say just how many different version of the Robin Hood legend there have been on film. It seems everyone has tried to tackle it at one time or another from the amazing 30s version with Errol Flynn to a much later version starring Kevin Costner. Mel Brooks has even given us his humorous take with "Robin Hood: Men in Tights." Now Ridley Scott, reteaming with Russell Crowe, gives us a different perspective on the old tale.

Iron Man 2

Rated: PG-13

The long-awaited sequel to 2008's mega-blockbuster has finally arrived, and with it, everyone's favorite narcissist-turned-humanitarian Tony Stark. The debate has already begun as to whether or not "Iron Man 2" lives up to its predecessor, or perhaps even surpasses it. Admittedly, I was not a huge fan of the first film, though I did enjoy it overall, so I would have to say that I fall into the second group.

The Losers

Rated: PG-13

Sylvain White's "The Losers" is the most entertaining film of the year so far. It's loud, full of explosions, and contains 2-D characters, but none of that ends up mattering due to its sheer entertainment value. Sadly, most critics have been seeing these traits as a bad thing, but that's because they're missing the point of a movie like this. It knows, like the audience knows, that no Oscars will be coming its way. It's here merely to give you one heck of a ride.

The Back-Up Plan

Rated: PG-13

Alan Poul's "The Back-Up Plan" is another film in a long line of films that are formulaic to the bone, containing little to no originality, all while following around characters that we could care less about. We've already had a fair share of films this year following this same formula, such as "The Bounty Hunter" and "She's Out of My League," so where was the need for yet another?

Date Night

Rated: PG-13

"Date Night" pairs two of the most popular comedians working today for a night that neither of the main characters will ever forget. Before the night is over, they are threatened, shot at, chased, and humiliated, all because of one of those amazing plot devices simply known as the "mistaken identity." Amazing how one little mistake can go such a long way.

Kick-Ass

Rated: R

Matthew Vaughn's "Kick-Ass," based off the comic book by Mark Millar and John Romita Jr., is an extremely violent, profanity-filled, action-packed film. It also makes for quite a fun time at the cinema as it doesn't simply use it all for entertainment value, but rather explores a theme that has been explored before, except this time using much younger heroes.

Death at a Funeral

Rated: R

In an age of movies where remakes are churned out one after the other comes yet another with "Death at a Funeral," a remake of the hilarious comedy of the same name from all the way back in 2007. You read that right: 2007. Apparently ideas are so sparse nowadays in the movie business that even movies from just a couple of years ago need to be remade.

A Nightmare on Elm Street

Rated: R

It's been more than 25 years since Wes Craven gave us the original horror classic, and now, several sequels later, "A Nightmare on Elm Street" gets an update with fresh faces, a slightly different Freddy, and a few scenes of homage to the original.

Clash of the Titans

Rated: PG-13

Louis Leterrier's "Clash of the Titans" is an update of the 1981 film of the same name that starred Laurence Olivier and was directed by Desmond Davis. Like the original, the update is a special effects extravaganza that uses the effects to pull the audience into the adventure. Many have already claimed that it fails to do this, however, I must admit, I had fun watching this remake that taps into the spirit of the original.

Hot Tub Time Machine

Rated: R

What a fascinating title. It's the kind of title that heightened my anticipation based on it alone. Then the trailer came out and the anticipation dropped a few notches. It still had the potential to be funny, and to be fair, it does have its share of funny moments. I suppose how many depends entirely on the viewer.

Why Did I Get Married Too?

Rated: PG-13

Tyler Perry has had an interesting career. Despite most of his movies getting a critical lashing after their release, for he apparently doesn't allow them to be screened prior, they have always performed quite well at the box office. He apparently has a niche that is devoted to his films, and his latest was no exception.

Remember Me

Rated: PG-13

What struck me most after watching "Remember Me" was just how one-note the whole film felt. The entire film casts a feeling of doom and gloom that is inescapable from scene to scene, always present, never lifting, even in the most joyous of moments. That probably explains why Robert Pattinson was attracted to the material. He's used to such a tone.

How To Train Your Dragon

Rated: PG

"How To Train Your Dragon" is another one of those stories of the unlikely hero who will end up saving the day when everything looks hopeless. We may have seen such a story...

Repo Men

Rated: R

"Repo Men" is best described as "Repo! The Genetic Opera" meets "Minority Report." Never heard of that first film? Don't feel bad. It didn't make much of a splash when it came out and was a terrible film to boot. Anyways, it just goes to show that "Repo Men" didn't have much originality to begin with despite where it was getting its source material from, which in this case, was the book "Repossession Mambo" by Eric Garcia.

The Bounty Hunter

Rated: PG-13

Andy Tennant's "The Bounty Hunter" takes what could have been an interesting premise and stretches it out into a nearly two-hour tedious exercise. In its overly-bloated runtime, it offers little in the way of entertainment mainly because the material doesn't require nearly this much time, so we end up with a lot of excess fluff.

Green Zone

Rated: R

Paul Greengrass's "Green Zone" has a fascinating premise which some may claim to be factual, though the film is apparently not based on a true story. Imagine that the war in Iraq was based off of fabricated intelligence. Imagine the only reason that the US went to war there was because a top official in the CIA lied about the existence of WMD....despite being told by a top Iraqi general that there were none.

Our Family Wedding

Rated: PG-13

Rick Famuyiwa's "Our Family Wedding" takes a tired premise and is able to inject it with the much-needed humor it requires in order to keep it from going stale. It's kind of like a mix of other films, taking a little bit from "Father of the Bride" and combining it with "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner," and while it doesn't get to the level of those films, it still provides several good laughs in the process.

She's Out of My League

Rated: R

Jim Field Smith's "She's Out of My League" is another one of those comedies that you'll be able to tell whether or not you'll enjoy it from the opening scene. It has the kind of lowbrow humor that you would find in films like Kevin Smith's most recent work, "Cop Out." If you're into that kind of humor, you might enjoy it, but for everyone else, it's an excruciating ride from beginning to end.

Brooklyn's Finest

Rated: R

Director Antoine Fuqua returns to the underworld of cops who are corrupt and on the edge, where violence is an everyday fact. Fuqua previously explored this world in "Training Day," except that in his most recent film, "Brooklyn's Finest," he has three stories running simultaneously instead of just focusing on one.

The Crazies

Rated: R

Breck Eisner's "The Crazies" has been advertised as a kind of horror/thriller, which makes it rather strange that the film is somewhat lacking in both of those areas. There is some horror to the situation in which the characters find themselves, but if you're looking for horror in terms of something that will scare you, then you'll probably be a bit disappointed.

Cop Out

Rated: R

It's rather difficult to have to talk about Kevin Smith in a negative sense. His films tend to be interesting, charming, witty, and character-driven, which is everything that is missing from his latest film, "Cop Out." He puts those positive characteristics aside for others like dull, painfully-unfunny, poorly-written, and filled to the brim with clichés and plotholes.

Alice in Wonderland

Rated: PG

Director Tim Burton, well-known for his dark style of filmmaking ("Sweeney Todd," "Edward Scissorhands," and "Batman" to name a few), returns with his take on Lewis Carroll's classic story, "Alice in Wonderland." You'll find many of the elements, characters, and events here from the original Disney version, but knowing Burton's work, it's not going to be as simple as all that. He takes this story, which has been adapted multiple times, and adds his own touch to it.

The White Ribbon

Rated: R

Michael Haneke's "The White Ribbon" is a film that has already had a lot of buzz about it ever since it won the Golden Palm (the equivalent of Best Picture) at the Cannes Film Festival last year. Now that it's gotten a limited release it has gathered more positive reviews from critics and even a couple of Oscar nominations for Best Cinematography and Best Foreign Language Film, but is it worthy of the buzz it's been receiving?

From Paris with Love

Rated: R

Throughout Pierre Morel's "From Paris with Love," I was constantly reminded of two films from last year: "Terminator Salvation" and "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra." Now if you've seen either of those two films (both of which got dishonorable mentions on my list of worst films of the year), you know that this can't possibly be a good thing.

Crazy Heart

Rated: R

What else can be said about Jeff Bridges's performance in Scott Cooper's "Crazy Heart?" He's had just about every accolade thrown at him from every conceivable angle, but he's deserved every bit of it. At the risk of saying what's already been said, it truly is that good of a portrayal of a character that we've seen before, but not quite in this way.

The Wolfman

Rated: R

Nearly 70 years after the original film in which Lon Chaney Jr. played the titular character comes a remake of the classic story. Joe Johnston's version of the film has painstakingly recreated the time period the story takes place in. It has the look, it has the feel, but it is curiously lacking in substance, and not only that. For a thriller, it doesn't really have any thrills to it.

Shutter Island

Rated: R

After finally winning a Best Director Oscar back in 2007 (it only took about 30 years...), Martin Scorsese returns to the thriller genre which he hasn't done since "Cape Fear." Most known for his mafia films like "Goodfellas" and "The Departed," it's refreshing to see such a famed director try something different once in a while, and with "Shutter Island," he doesn't disappoint.

Valentine's Day

Rated: PG-13

Couples, if you want to do yourselves a big favor, don't take your boy/girlfriend to see "Valentine's Day." Keeping this one simple rule in mind is one big step towards keeping your relationship going. How could such an innocent movie about romance be THAT bad? Oh, let me count the ways.

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

Rated: PG

Here we have yet another film based off of a novel that is supposedly popular with teenagers, but that I had never heard of until the film (like "Harry Potter" or "Twilight"). "Percy Jackson" is like a combination of both Potter and "The Chronicles of Narnia," but it never quite reaches the level of those films because of a few overarching problems with the story.

The Young Victoria

Rated: PG

Here is a romance the way only someone in a position like Queen Victoria's could experience it. The eyes of the empire are watching her every move with not much being kept private or out of speculation. All of this occurs while the young queen must determine how to run her kingdom and who should be around her to help do so.

Edge of Darkness

Rated: R

Martin Campbell's "Edge of Darkness" has been rather misleading with its marketing. From the trailers and TV spots, this film is made to look like a revenge thriller along the lines of last year’s surprise hit "Taken." However, that's not what we get with this film. Instead, we get a film that plays out more like a procedural cop film with small elements of a thriller.

Dear John

Rated: PG-13

Here's a great idea. Let's take the guy most known for being flat and lifeless in "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra" and put him in a movie that actually requires emotions to make it work. Lasse Hallström's "Dear John" proves what happens when you do something silly like miscasting a part with an actor who is not up to the task.

When In Rome

Rated: PG-13

Straight off the romantic-comedy assembly line comes "When in Rome," a film that is just about as generic as you can get when it comes to the genre. It's another example of a film that doesn't try too hard in either area and ends up failing in both because of it.

Youth in Revolt

Rated: R

One of these days people are going to realize that Michael Cera is not a good actor, but today is not that day as we have yet another film with him playing the exact same awkward character that he's played in every single movie he's been in since he became a star.

The Lovely Bones

Rated: PG-13

The team behind the brilliant "Lord of the Rings" brings us something completely different with their new project, "The Lovely Bones." After "King Kong," it was hoped that director Peter Jackson would return to more imaginative and engaging stories.

Leap Year

Rated: PG

At first, it looked like Anand Tucker's "Leap Year" would be another painfully predictable rom-com that would be as bad as "Did You Hear About the Morgans?" Fortunately, only part of that statement is true.

Daybreakers

Rated: R

The Spierig Brothers' "Daybreakers" offers an interesting twist on your standard vampire tale. Instead of it being just one or a few vampires causing havoc, imagine if it were nearly the entire world population infected with a disease causing vampirism.

The Book of Eli

Rated: R

The Hughes' Brothers "The Book of Eli" is like "The Road" with a pulse. That doesn't necessarily mean it's a good film though...

From Paris With Love

Rated: R

Throughout Pierre Morel's "From Paris with Love," I was constantly reminded of two films from last year: "Terminator Salvation" and "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra."

Legion

Rated: R

According to this film, the first time God lost faith in humanity, he caused a flood to destroy them. Now, having lost faith in mankind again, he sends an army of angels to wipe them out. However...

Tooth Fairy

Rated: PG

I'll be one of the few to say that this film is not nearly as bad as you might think, which is saying quite a lot about a film feature Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in a pink tutu. It is not without a certain...