At the auction, the man's eye caught the most beautiful parrot he had ever seen. Determined to have the bird, he began bidding. Each time he bid, someone out bid him. Higher and higher the bidding went until, finally, he won the bird.
As he was paying the Auctioneer for the parrot, he commented, "I certainly hope this parrot can talk. After what I'm paying for him, I would hate to find out that he can't."
"Talk? Don't you worry sir, he can talk," replied the Auctioneer. "Who do you think kept bidding against you?"
A man returned from Burma with a remarkable mynah bird that had learned to talk and drink gin and tonic. One day the man and his bird stopped in a bar for a drink. The bartender was arrested for contributing to the delinquency of mynahs.
Extra Bonus Joke:
A bird breeder, who dealt with only species that are normally wild, not parrots, canaries, or parakeets, had a difficult life, getting up early to feed all his charges, never taking a vacation, working hard, and yet he enjoyed his life.
When the local newspaper interviewed him for a feature story, they asked him if he was sorry about the life he'd chosen for himself.
His reply? "I have no egrets."